Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
as a side note pls kill me
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize