Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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