You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
is this the sara with the beer cane?
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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