She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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