he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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