she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
