Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Randomize