i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
