is wine microwaveable?
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
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