I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
