I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Randomize
