umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize