i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
