if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
i need an iv and a liver transplant
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
My day in three words: secret purse cake
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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