don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
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