omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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