i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
