1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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