She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Randomize