the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
my nose is crying tears of wow.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize
