Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
