Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize