I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize