yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
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