i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
