does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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