there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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