This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
