So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Randomize