Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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