shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
