Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize