Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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