i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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