I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Randomize
