It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
