she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
