every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
