Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
