I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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