I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Randomize
