Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
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