is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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