Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize