I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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