if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize