Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
