Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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