Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
