hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
handjob tips. give me some.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
