I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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